Almost Doesn’t Count
Layla (my daughter) called. She was very excited about something. She was listening to What’s the Tee, RuPaul’s podcast and he (she/they?) told Normani (who was a guest that day) that “Almost Doesn’t Count” was his (her/their?) favorite Brandy track from Never Say Never. (Someone please help me here. How does RuPaul prefer to be addressed?)
Brandy herself has often said that “Almost Doesn’t Count” is her favorite song to perform. She did so again last week on the Billboard Music Awards. She’s recorded a lot of songs in her career and just released a new stellar album (b7) so I’m grateful that she still loves to sing a song I wrote.
I’ve wondered why. She’s had massive hits. We’ve all been sittin’ up in our room at some point crushin’ on some dude or chic. I myself have many-a-hormonal-teenage-memory of “tremors in my heart” in the privacy of that space. (That’s a line btw, from Sittin’ Up In My Room.” And what a line it is!) But perhaps it’s songs about the “almosts” — the ones that got away — which stay with us the longest.
Of course, Brandy’s voice has much to do with the success of the track. On the podcast RuPaul added, ”there’s a vibration in Brandy’s voice that I’m addicted to.” But I have to believe that it also has something to do with the boundary-free universality of unrequited love — and that moment we realize, after years of magical thinking, the one we always hoped would love us back never will.
For some reason a lot of people have been reaching out to me lately to tell me that this song is their jam… that I’ve captured the way they have felt themselves. It’s funny, because “Almost” almost didn’t happen. When Guy Roche and I sat down to write I made a list of all the ‘almosts’ I could think of about this one particular breakup: He almost said he loved me. He almost had me thinking he would turn around. That’s what songwriters do. We take notes. But Guy and I put it on the back burner because we weren’t sure where it fit…was it urban (an acceptable term back then) or pop or country? We weren’t sure who would record it. Silly us. Writers should never be thinking about that stuff while they’re writing. It’s so easy to lose the plot. Luckily we came back to it a few months later because its energy wouldn’t leave us alone. The song wanted to be finished.
The following year Brandy nailed it and then country artist Mark Wills had a hit with it too.
My own recent version of the song on my album 2.0 etc…came easily. American Songwriter (Hal Horowitz) wrote, “Peiken,” (that’s me!)…sings it over acoustic piano, infusing the tune with a (Carole) King, or even Laura Nyro, feel.” (To be in the same sentence with these legends!)
The approach was producer Eve Nelson at her best. She played a rough take on a plugin called Alicia’s Keys (a sound based on Alicia’s own Yamaha C3 Neo.) Eve’s plan was to sketch out the arrangement and then replay it on her Steinway Grand. But as far as I was concerned her first take was a keeper. So emotionally fulfilling. I didn’t want her to touch a note. (Alicia knows what she’s doing.) And as far as overdubs: Why? Why put more icing than needed a cake? Adam Dorn threw on some bass and Eve flicked a matchbook cover for percussion. That’s it. I can’t tell you how good it feels for as songwriter to put their own voice behind their own words. Then again, I guess I just did.
I’m eternally grateful to Brandy and to Suzan Koc for pitching the track to Atlantic Records’ Craig Kallman in 1997 when it had nothing to do with the purpose of their meeting. 😳 That’s what a song publisher was all about back then. Turns out “Almost Doesn’t Count”’ actually counted…a lot. And looking back I can honestly say, I’m glad that idiot broke my heart.
Here’s RuPaul:
Here’s Eve and I. …
Big hugs to Nicole Powers who filmed and edited that footage and for believing in my journey. She’s been across the pond for months and I hope that we’ll be able to see each other again soon!
Thanks for reading, my friends. Have a listen to my new album, 2.0 etc... For fun stories about how my songs came to be get a copy of “Confessions of a Serial Songwriter.” If you'd like to receive my blog via email, please click here. Follow me on Twitter and Insta. Visit my Serial Songwriter Facebook Page. Stay Safe! ☮️